When blacking out and falling to the ground, I was judging myself for being dramatic.
When being hysterical after an emotional setback, I was still judging myself for being dramatic.
When being informed of my husband’s father passing away, I was judging myself for being dramatic and crying.
While I see him trying to bounce back and immersing himself in work, I sit here and judge myself for struggling to concentrate on my own work.
The thing is, I know being judgmental is not good. I work very hard on not judging people because it’s impossible to be familiar with all their circumstances and feelings. Sure, I judge people for wearing a striped shirt with striped trousers, but for the most part I try and be sensitive.
I have always believed that I am very self-aware. That obviously can’t be true all the time, but it is reasonable to say I usually know where my head is at. That has some obvious downsides. Like why the eff do I need to judge myself right now? Ha, I am judging myself for judging myself. It’s hilarious and a tiny bit pathetic. No ironies are lost on me at this time. It’s just a really bizarre time.