I met Karan after three years yesterday. One person who has completely transformed over the years, but has retained the charm and sweetness. He was one of my bestest friends in school, but time and space never let us meet while we were both in the same part of the world. I shifted to Pune, and he came visiting his parents who live here. And so we met. It was my best day in this city. Or, the best day since I have moved, and the best in the ‘city’ anyway. We drove around the mad traffic-filled roads, walked in the persistent drizzle, and ate food that was not yellow. Talked about the Parsis and the several bakeries at MG Road, or a place called Dhole Patil Road which I need to visit soon (for food, of course), the good-looking Jats in Delhi, the awesome weather of Pune and the irresponsible society that we are among other things. I listened to radio after ages, and laughed at Sud for more reasons than one. A kid came selling flowers at a traffic signal and he bought some for me. That led to many many more people wanting to sell something or the other to him. One of them had a shady bike toy to sell. All the vehicles around us had people staring at us, and we could not stop laughing at the Harley Davidson which was too small for him.
While coming back, sitting in his car made me feel I was in Delhi. I felt as if I had spent a long day out with friends and now one of them was going to drop me back home. I did not want to come back to the hostel. Not because I don’t like it, but because I suddenly realised that the life I have given up is very different from the one that I am living now. I wanted to go back. I know there will hardly be anyone there to spend time with, but all memories of all the times spent with different friends came rushing back. I have been struggling with them for more than 24 hours now. I can’t even cry because I know there is no point in it. I want to, but not a single tear is willing to drop. I don’t know since when I got so practical about emotions! Maybe I should be thankful that I got to talk to Avan and Sumi today. But like I was telling Avan, I need someone to pamper me. I want attention. Special attention. And I know I will get none of it here. It isn’t just management training that I have come here for. Literal ‘alone’ is happening. I need a break. Yes, already!
My ray of hope is the 15th August break. It is at the risk of a warning letter for not being on campus on a mandatory attendance day, but I’d rather take that happily than not be home at that time. Nidhi called too. Got some family updates from her. And how I wish tomorrow wasn’t a Sunday! I will be moving from campus to city for a seminar in the 7:00 a.m. bus, and my family will call me at lunch only to remind me that they are all together at home. I am glad Ma doesn’t tell me what she’s made for lunch/dinner when I ask her. It is nice to not know. Selfish reassurances!
Finding it hard to break this chain of thoughts…
PS – My complexion has changed beyond belief. It’s almost I have moved to the south. It’s the hills’ sun – piercing and sharp. The tan is just too much!